Today was sort of a scary day for me.

I had a massive stomach ache.

Now usually, stomach aches are normal for me. I’ve had gas problems as a child so my tolerance for stomach aches are quite quite high.

However, today, after having lunch with my mom, I had a massive stomach ache. Something that I was not used to tolerating.

Initially, I thought it was just that I ate a lot. That what I was feeling was fullness. Like literally as we drove out of the restaurant I was like, “Darn it, Stephanie. Why did you eat so much? Remember: hara hachi bu! Only eat until 80% full. You stuffed yourself.”

But after a couple of minutes, I felt a pang in my stomach. It was different to fullness – no, I’m a common customer for fullness. I literally stuff myself full like every other meal lol. No, it wasn’t fullness.Was it gas? No – I’ve been having gas problems since 5 years old and this was definitely not gas. Then what was it?

It was really hard to diagnose what I had and even looking at water made me want to vomit. I just couldn’t fathom putting anything in my mouth.

Short end of long story, the pain decreased after 30 minutes. By then, I could tolerate it. And this again, remind you, is my high tolerance for stomach pains. But after about 2 hours, it was completely gone.

I still don’t know what that incident was and I probably won’t know in the near future, but what I do know is that my wellbeing is the utmost priority.

It’s at times like this that I realize I take too many things for granted. I nitpick at the thickness of my thighs, the “wings” on my arms, the flab on my stomach. I suck in my stomach whenever I pass the mirror. But at times like this, I realize that I was shallow.

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If you couldn’t tell…my fingers are forming a heart. Giving much love and kisses to those who need love because we are all beautiful.

As mentioned in my self-love post a few days ago, I’m still in the process of loving my body. Loving it truly the way it is right now. That the reason I’m eating healthy and that I exercise is NOT because I hate how my body looks and I want it to look a certain way, but because I want to feel nourished and empowered and healthy. That word, healthy is abused so much here, but today, this incident reminded me what healthy meant.

Healthy does not mean a certain number on the scale. A certain number on the label of your clothes. A certain number of how many calories you’ve eaten. Healthy does not mean your appearance. For the better or worse, healthy means different to everyone. It’s such a relative term which is why I think it’s been abused so much.

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But as I’m slowly moving forward in my self-love journey, I start to build my own definition of healthy. And so far this is what I have: being healthy means to enjoy life without any limitations.

I really don’t want to get that stomach ache ever again – a stomach ache that I could barely sit still with. A stomach ache that I truly felt helpless and out of control with my body.

So yep. That’s what healthy means to me thus far. I’m sure as I add more years and experience to my life, this definition will change. But so far, that’s it: to enjoy life without any limitation. To feel powerful and confident.

What does healthy mean to you?

xoxo,

Stephanie

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17 thoughts on ““Healthy”

  1. Glad you’re feeling better! Healthy to me means having lots of energy to go about doing all the many things I need to do on a daily basis without falling apart or getting seriously tired.. Food plays a crucial role in maintaining a healthy body! This was a really good post 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Shadee, thank you for stopping by and with your heartfelt comments! I love your definition of healthy! And as an avid follower of your blog, I can definitely tell how much importance you put on your food – it really does play a huge role! Here’s to both of us being “healthy” in our own respective definitions! xo, Steph

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  2. It’s good to know that you’re better now. I have this habit of stuffing myself and I don’t stop until I’m full when I like what’s on the table. Since I am a working mom and my family loves to eat, there are times when after eating dinner, we also munch on midnight snacks. It’s really time for us to control the snakes in our stomach. Thanks for your blog, whenever I read your post, it reminds me that health is absolutely important. Do you have any tips on how I can control my sugar cravings? I love sweets and though one of my resolutions this year is to lessen my love for jt, I still find myself eating at an unlimited dessert diner. Thanks, Steph! More power!

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    1. Hi! Thanks for stopping by! I am definitely on the same page as you – I do so well during breakfast and lunch and then during dinner – bam! I just eat so much. I think the key is to make sure that your meals are balanced – to balance out your caloric intake so that you don’t feel ravenous by dinner. I’ve also found that it helps to sip water and take smaller bites and put down your fork between each bite helps with eating less. As for sugar…hm…I’ve never really ate dessert as my mom would only give me fruit after dinner as “dessert.” I think it’s definitely something you can taste your tastebuds to. I am an insane fruit lover so eating fruit after dinner wasn’t bad for me, but I’m sure after a few days after eating fruit, you’ll get the hang of it too. Best of luck and thanks for stopping by with the encouraging words. Have a great weekend! xo, Steph

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  3. Hi Stephanie. Great post! Add another thing we have in common! I have many problems with my stomach too. That’s also where I get hit when I’m stressed. I am almost finished a post on stress and your stomach. Do you find that you are stressed + eating causes it more? Or is it food related only?

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    1. Hi Samantha! Thanks for stopping by! I don’t think my stress and my stomach ache are correlated if that makes sense. I think it’s more of that I stress eat quite a lot. But for that particular incident, I wasn’t stressed at all since I’m on spring break so now stress about tests or papers haha. I think for that particular incident, I think it was something that I ate that upset my stomach. However, I really need to fix on my stress eating though yikes. Can’t wait to read your upcoming post! Have a great weekend! Xo, Steph

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      1. Thanks for sweet wishes! Just need to figure out how to NOT stress eat haha. I have still many more years of school and papers and exams left, so I better figure it out soon! Have a great Sunday too! xoxo, Step

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  4. Well glad you are feeling better but it seems to me that you may be allergic to something as your pain shouldn’t last that long. I usually get bloated especially when I eat a lot or any type of carbs and it goes away within 30 minutes. You should drink apple cider vinegar to help with your digestive system. It does wonders for you

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  5. This is a great post and a wonderful question to pose to your readers! Healthy means so many different things and can be defined in so many ways. Healthy to me means being able to live my life to the fullest, having the energy to move my body in ways that feels amazing, and to feel balanced and at ease physically/mentally/emotionally. As far as your stomach issues, my twin and I were diagnosed with IBS in our early teens. We’ve had our share of stomach pains and symptoms! Sometimes the sensation/pain is hard to describe, but I’ve had sharp pains that are very brief before. It’s difficult to pinpoint the cause, but just be sure to hydrate and listen to your body. Stress, both good and bad, can heighten my problems, but I’ve noticed they follow very closely with my normal hormone shifts. You’re right that in these moments, they give us clarity and make us truly thankful for all that we have!

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    1. Hi Kori! Thanks for this sweet message! I love your definition of healthy. Funny enough, even after that post my definition of healthy has changed. In fact, this definition changes every day. Hmmm…I’m going to have to check out IBS. Maybe that might be it. Thanks for your concerns. xoxo Steph

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